Wedding Requirements

175 days till our wedding. Most of our major suppliers were already booked, DP were paid, and schedule for the meeting were set. I got one more month (December) to make some more searching for the shorlisted candidates for the remaining vendors that doesn’t need much work.

Santuario de San Jose. The wedding ceremony will be held at this church. You may check the location of this church at my previous blog. I have not encountered any problems yet since my mom made the deposit to block the date. Our date being a Sunday was not a problem after all, luckily when she made the reservation, 2 PM slot was still available, immediately, i told her to have it pencil booked and visit the church. I even told her several times to ask how to go about the pre-cana and canonical interview since both of us is out of the country. We’re flying home is coming January and that’s the only time we could arrange the requirements. Hassle free as of this date.

These are the requirements that we need to accomplish this coming January:

Baptismal Certificate – recently issued with annotation “FREE TO MARRY or FOR MARRIAGE PURPOSE. Please present this upon reservation. This is valid for 6 months only.

“We planned to ask favors from our family to get this for us before coming home so we don’t need to wait for the release. December is the best time, enough time for the 6 months validity until our wedding day.”

Confirmation Certificate – Our moms cannot remember if we had our confirmation when we were kids. So we plan to have it done also this coming January. I have no idea how to go about it. Luckily, my ever reliable sissies at W@W posted one with regards to this. “San Miguel church, the one near Gate 2 of Malacañang are holding “Mass” Confirmation every Sunday. We need to be there betweein 9:00 to 9:30, so we can attend a seminar/pre-confirmation before the actual administration of the sacrament. You may also check the schedule at 7351611 or 7341271. You will get the Certificate on the same day. Bring with you the following requirements:

• 
  
  baptismal certificate or photocopy of it
• 
  
  1 ninong/ninang
• 
  
  600 pesos confirmation fee

Publication of Wedding Banns – for 3 consecutive Sundays in the parish of bride and groom. WRITTEN PERMISSION from the parish of the bride

Marriage License is usually obtained in the city hall of either the bride or groom. Choose the city hall that is most convenient for you.

I asked h2b where he preferred to get this…well of course Manila City Hall”

Requirements:

• 
  
  Original and Photocopy of our Valid IDs with Manila address
• 
  
  Original Birth certificate issued by NSO
• 
  
  Original CENOMAR issued by NSO
• 
  
  Seminar (9-10 a.m. / 1:30-2:30p.m. daily)
• 
  
  fee of 120.00

Release of license is 10 working days after submission of complete requirements

*Note: Be sure NOT to sign beforehand the document that will be asked of you to sign.

You need to SIGN the document IN FRONT OF THE CLERK who will ask you to swear that the information printed are true. If you accidentally sign it, you will be asked to buy another form again. Validity of marriage license is 3 months

CENOMAR of bride/groom –>validity is about 6 mos. This is obtained at the NSO and costs 180Php each. Around 10-14 days waiting time before you can claim. You may also call the NSO Helpline Plus 7371111 to obtain it thru phone.

Canonical Interview of the bride and groom by a priest of Sanctuario de San Jose at least a month prior to the wedding date. Kindly coordinate with the parish office regarding the schedule.

Spiritual Preparations The couple is required to attend a Catholic Pre-Cana seminar regularly held in this parish. Should the couple decide to avail of it outside of this parish, they are required to submit a certificate of attendance. They are also required to go CONFESSION prior to the wedding day.

Additional information on the next blog…

Earth Colors

We’ve finally decided on what colors to use. After several change of minds, I asked Far-ouT what is his favorite colors. He mentioned few red, gray, black, blue, yellow…YELLOW! He requested for light ones though, I too do not approve of dark colors. I particularly like ORANGE. We settled for earth colors. The right shades of it will compliment the outdoor theme. We will carefully choose the color for the invites, the entourage dresses, up to the littlest details in the reception. We want to show a little of nature that we love…so I surf the ever reliable net and found these few info about it…

aLL aBouT CoLoRs

…to Terra-fic, the fanlisting for Earth Colours. Earth colours are defined as any naturally occuring pigment. They range from brilliant burnt reds as seen on trees during the fall, to deep browns like the soils of the earth. Various shades of brown and muted shades of red, orange, yellow and green can all be considered earth colours. If you are a fan of these gorgeous shades of colour, you are definitely welcome to join. Earth colours can be found all over the world, everywhere you look in various shades of brown and muted shades of red, orange, yellow and green. Earth colors have even been on artists’ palettes for thousands of years. The Art Glossary describes Earth Colours as colours made with naturally occurring pigments, such as umbers, ochres, and siennas, rather than laboratory-produced (’chemical’) pigments. this colors represents protection, security, stability, the person’s sense of safety. It influences calm and peace that enables the person to be in tuned with the body’s messages to promote balance and health.

Earth colors are muted and not clear or bright. The vibrant summery color palette included coral pink, light pink, golden yellow, light yellow, kiwi green, and aqua.

FINDING AND KEEPING A LIFE PARTNER

When it comes to making the decision about choosing a life partner, no one wants to make a mistake. Yet, with a divorce rate of close to 50%, it appears that many are making serious mistakes in their approach to finding Mr./Miss. Right!

If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting married, they'll say: "We're in love"; I believe this is the #1 mistake people make when they date. Choosing a life partner should never be based on love. Though this may sound "not politically correct",there' s a profound truth here. Love is not the basis for getting married. Rather, love is the result of a good marriage. When the other ingredients are right, then the love will come. Let me say it again:

"You can't build a lifetime relationship on love alone"; You need a lot more!!! Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about finding and keeping a life partner.

QUESTION ..1: Do we share a common life purpose?

Why is this so important? Let me put it this way: If you're married for 20 or 30 years, that's a long time to live with someone. What do you plan to do with each other all that time? Travel, eat and jog together? You need to share something deeper and more meaningful. You need a common life purpose.

Two things can happen in a marriage: (1) You can grow together, or (2) you can grow apart. 50% of the people out there are growing apart. To make a marriage work, you need to know what you want out of life! Bottom line; and marry someone who wants the same thing.

QUESTION .. 2: Do I feel safe expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person?

This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship. Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. The basis of having good communication is trust - i.e. trust that I won't get "punished"; or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings. A colleague of mine defines an abusive person as someone with whom you feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings. Be honest with yourself on this one. Make sure you feel emotionally safe with the person you plan to marry.

QUESTION .. 3: Is he/she a mensch?

A mensch is someone who is a refined and sensitive person. How can you test? Here are some suggestions. Do they work on personal growth on a regular basis? Are they serious about improving themselves? A teacher of mine defines a good person as "someone who is always striving to be good and do the right ";.So ask about your Significant other What do they do with their time? Is this person materialistic? Usually a materialistic person is not someone whose top priority is character refinement.

There are essentially two types of people in the world: (1) People who are dedicated to personal growth and (2) people who are dedicated to seeking comfort. Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will put personal comfort ahead of doing the right thing. You need to know that before walking down the aisle.

QUESTION 4: How does he/she treat other people?

The one most important thing that makes any relationship work is the ability to give. By giving, we mean the ability to give another person pleasure. Ask: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure to others or are they wrapped up in themselves and self-absorbed? To measure this, think about the following: How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such as waiters, bus boys, taxi drivers, etc. . How do they treat their parents and siblings? Do they have gratitude and appreciation? If they don't have gratitude for the people who have given them everything; Can you do nearly as much for them? You can be sure that someone who treats others poorly, will eventually treat you poorly as well.

QUESTION .. 5: Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're married?

Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention of trying to "improve" them after they're married. As a colleague of mine puts it: "You can probably expect someone to change after marriage for the worse" If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now, then you are not ready to marry them. In conclusion, dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous. The key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart. It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating; to be sure to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues. Falling in love is a great feeling, but when you wake up with a ring on your finger, you don't want to find yourself in trouble because you didn't do your homework. Another perspective....There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance....It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going anywhere relationships. Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention....Which ones lift and which ones lean? Which ones encourage and which ones discourage? Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill? When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse? Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know, or appreciate you?

The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you...the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of your life. An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye"; Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, pity, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults aren't really that important.

Do you bring out the best in each other? Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete, compare and control? What do you bring to the relationship? Do you bring past relationships, past hurt, past mistrust, past pain? You can't take someone to the altar to alter them. You can't make someone love you or make someone stay. If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a life"; you won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain. Seeking status, sex, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship.

WHAT KEEPS A RELATIONSHIP STRONG ARE:

1. TRUST
2. COMMUNICATION
3. INTIMACY
4. A SENSE OF HUMOR
5. SHARING TASKS
6. SOME GETAWAY TIME WITHOUT BUSINESS OR CHILDREN
7. DAILY EXCHANGES (meal, shared activity, hug, call, touch, notes)
8. SHARING COMMON GOALS AND INTERESTS
9. GIVING EACH OTHER SPACE TO GROW WITHOUT FEELING INSECURE
10. GIVING EACH OTHER A SENSE OF BELONGING AND ASSURANCES OF COMMITMENT

If these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as resentment withdrawal, abuse, neglect, and dishonesty; and pain will replace it.

Happiness keeps You Sweet,
Trials keep You Strong,
Sorrows keep You Human,
Failures keep You Humble,
Success keeps You Glowing,
But......... Only GOD KEEPS YOU GOING!